You Can't Have It All

Some years ago, after reading The Gift of An Ordinary Day, I became a fan of the writer Katrina Kenison. Her observations are both quiet and profound, and I loved that she was a humble, thoughtful person; reading her work felt like communing with a friend. Following her blog over the years, I found a lot that resonated as she shared about the changing seasons of her life. Last week she posted “You Can’t Have It All”: a meditation on things she could celebrate in an incredibly difficult year for her after reading a poem of the same name by Barbara Ras. Her version is beautiful, and I love her suggestion that we could each write our own version of the poem every day.

Over the last ten years, I’ve experienced my fair share of less-than-ideal circumstances. Periods whose difficulty required fortitude and grim determination to get through. There were so many lessons in those trying times, but I think the most important was my discovery that focusing on what is (all the good that you do have, despite the shit show you may be starring in) is the key to not just surviving but thriving. With joy. So of course, I was delighted to accept the challenge (despite poetry being way out of my wheelhouse) of attempting my own poem. This is today’s.

You can’t have it all.

But you can have a peaceful sanctuary that protects and nourishes you. That reminds you everywhere you look of who you are and what you love. Where there are sunflowers in the entryway and zinnias in the kitchen and gerbera daisies on your nightstand. Where you wake every morning with gratitude for your peace.

You can greet the sunrise with your faithful companion and feel the slight breeze that heralds the arrival of fall and your joyful re-emergence.

You can savor hot coffee in the perfect lilac mug chosen for you by your beloved. With a toasted bagel slathered in sunflower seed butter on the plate that symbolizes your liberation.

You can’t have it all.

But you can have a miraculous daughter who is your favorite person in the world. With whom you can spend long afternoons engrossed in projects, and golden evenings eating roasted chicken and apple pie while watching shows that bring the comfort of a simpler time. You can have the delight of continuing to deepen your connection and, always, of healing laughter.

You can’t have it all.

But you can have an inner circle who know and love you just the way you are. Who’ve stayed when times were tough. Who’ve shown you who you are. You can have a community that makes you feel helped and helpful.

You can’t have it all.

But you can have enough physical and mental health to get up and seize each day; to wrest every drop of beauty from this amazing pageant; to maintain forward momentum. You can learn and grow. You’re alive.

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Thanks for reading! Care to share your own version?

Read the original here: You Can’t Have It All by Barbara Ras - Poems | Academy of American Poets

And read Katrina’s version here: you can't have it all - Katrina Kenison

GOOD THINGS

In response to last week’s post about sliding into a slump, a friend forwarded this post from Chop Wood, Carry Water listing wins that offer hope that maybe the tide is turning: Extra! Extra! 10/12 - by Jess Craven